OK… this post has less to do with Speechless Ministries per se and more to do with my own craziness, which clearly impacts everything I do – including speaking to various groups as God gives me the opportunity and writing and performing dramas. Plus, anyone who visits the site should know the real me and, really, that was kind of the point of the “blog” section anyway. So, here goes: I just left my kid at the karate school. That’s right: TOTALLY forgot what time I was supposed to pick him up! Picture it with me: I’m in the kitchen cooking dinner, which, since we’re being honest, really should warrant a news crew! I never cook. It just so happens that this fall I made some taco soup and miracle of miracles, my Honey loves it and requests it often. When you only have one “specialty” and your man requests it, you cook it. Period. So anyway, I’m in the kitchen cooking dinner and my cell phone rings. It’s Sensei. My heart does a little leap! Not because, mind you, I have forgotten to pick up my child, but because said child is, after all, at KARATE and he could be hurt!
“Hello?!”
“Hello… Mrs. Mulligan? This is Sensei calling on behalf of Caleb.”
“Yes?! [Geez, Mister, get to the point… I’m freaking out here!] Is he alright?!” Note that I have still not realized WHY the poor man is calling!
“Yes… yes, he’s fine, but… class is over.”
“OH MY GOSH! I am so sorry! I am on my way as we speak. I am so sorry! I was thinking class was over at 7:30! Oh my gosh! See you in a minute!!”
The Suburban could not move fast enough through the streets of my town and the whole way there I kept thinking, “Ugh! I usually try to hide my craziness a little better than this!’ How totally crazy is that? I know Sensei to be a Christian man and he was all smiles and “no problems” when I got there. My sweet first born actually argued with me a little when I apologized, saying it was his fault that I was late. Bless his pumpkin heart. In the end, all was well and we made our way back home laughing and talking like we usually do. But as I finished dinner, I decided I shouldn’t try to hide my craziness from anybody. I’ve officially decided it’s a good thing that my true, slightly disheveled self is now out there for Sensei to know and laugh at over dinner. (Note I am assuming here that he couldn’t have POSSIBLY realized I was crazy before now! Ha!)
It’s a good thing because if we’re honest with each another, we’re all crazy in some way. Some of us are better at hiding it or polishing it up, but the bottom line is, we’ve all lost our minds somewhere along the way. If you haven’t, you soon will. And that’s OK. “Crazy people” need a sense of humor and understanding friends and family – and, incidentally, a really good calendar app on their phones! “Crazy people” need grace and lots of it. We need God. And when we stop trying to hide the crazy, we let God and everyone else get a little closer to us. We realize more easily how good God and those family and friends have been. And we are much better equipped to love them from the kind of heart that loves best: an honest, true, open one.
So, the next time you are feeling a little crazy, remember, first of all, that you are not alone. You can confidently say to yourself, “No worries… I’m sure Joeli is somewhere losing her mind at this very moment!” And most importantly, remember that God is well aware of your crazy and wants to use it to keep you honest! Embrace the crazy. I think we’ll all be better for it!
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